Mitt Romney's Cure for Masturbation »
Posted By Radiofreeeuropa 8 months ago in StyleNow to be fair, the Mormon church is probably not that much different than other religions, most of which decree that if something feels good, it's immoral. If you're having way too much fun, more than likely you're sinning. Now that he is gone from the Presidential race, here's one last chance to make fun of him!
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Radiofreeeuropa
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Comments So Far: 73
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Radiofreeeuropa8 months ago
Now that Romney is not a candidate, we have one last chance to poke some fun at him. Included is a link to the actual document about masturbation from the Mormons. Just in time for Valentines Day! Send yourself some roses. Humorous.
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1-2-Oscar7 months, 4 weeks ago
I think that every regular on this site knows that I have had little good to say about Mitt Romney, but I would NEVER stoop to posting such garbage as this about ANY candidate. As NoSpinDave has noted, this submission reveals far more about your character than it does about Mr. Romney.
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BronxBomber8 months ago
That was funny thanx RFE.
I got a couple pertaining to this post:
Q. How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
A. His hand caught on fire.
Q. What two people were shot in a theater?
A. Abraham Lincoln, and the guy sitting in front of Pee Wee Herman.
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cowboygrandpa8 months ago
Rfe:
Good one. Had me ROTFLMAO hahahahahahaaha HAAAAA HAAAAAAAAA.
Yeah I guess it would be better to store it all up till you explode. LOL
I loved the one about tying your hand to the bed post. Yeah real good idea. In case of fire panic and try to untie your hand or drag the bed out with you. HA HA HA HA HA HA.
Or if you live in CA and there a major earthquake they will find you with hand tied to the bed, and say hmmmmmmm
must have been a Mormon trying not to masturbate. Poor devil he might have got out if his hand was free.
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mntnman4447 months, 4 weeks ago
Here's another link with even more "suggestions"...
http://www.moonmac.com/Mormon_masturbation.html
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AtheismIsRealityComment removed: User banned.
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Will13137 months, 4 weeks ago
5) "In the field of psychotherapy there is a very effective technique called aversion therapy...For example, if you are tempted to masturbate, think of having to bathe in a tub of worms, and eat several of them as you do the act."
That wouldn't work for me. I kinda like worms. A tub full of Republicans might do the trick, though.
----
Ann Coulter comes to mind..
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david_nwpa7 months, 4 weeks ago
So one of the cures for night time masturbation is to look like Harvey the 6 foot tall rabbit of Jimmy Stewart fame? Does anyone else think this is utterly insane? Fine, then I will dress like Bugs Bunny before going to bed. Then again, I might sleep with Daffy Duck if the price were right.
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Teech7 months, 4 weeks ago
Yeah, Republicans are way too busy screwing this country to have to masturbate.
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Radiofreeeuropa7 months, 4 weeks ago
I imagine Mitt has more than just time on his hands now.
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icono17 months, 4 weeks ago
I like this one;
7) "Pray. But when you pray, don't pray about this problem, for that will tend to keep [it] in your mind more than ever. Pray for faith, pray for understanding of the Scriptures, pray for the Missionaries."
....wasn't it the Missionaries that taught the Missionary Position to the Godless heathens? An' I'll bet, if the truth be known, the missionaries had to demonstrate that position to the heathens.... probably much to the enjoyment of everyone watching. esp the missionaries.
Damx I'm getting hot just thinking about it...
I need to go put my bunny suit on sans batteries and pray that my naked body, pot belly, gray hair and etc., doesnt turn me on while I tie my hands to the bed post......my significant other just gave me a very salacious look and said "Praise the Lord for the Mormons" and is running to get the Whip Creme!!!!!.
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bill4917 months, 4 weeks ago
Will1313 wrote "Ann Coulter comes to mind..".... when commenting on aversion therapy. Different stokes for different folks.A life-long liberal, I cannot stand Coulter's politics. But I find myself downloading videos of her, because of her body. I like woman who are lithe and long-limbed. So indeed, she is for me a sexual fantasy, just as long as she remains silent, except for moans and groans of sexual delight.
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david_nwpa7 months, 4 weeks ago
Since I am a gay man, I will take both of your comments lightly. I can think of a zillion things to do with Ann Coulter, but none are sexual.
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BronxBomber7 months, 4 weeks ago
NO sense of humor, maybe they forgot to drink they're coffee this morning. I don't think that would help though...some of the neg voters are brain dead.
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Will13137 months, 4 weeks ago
the picture of Mitt.. looks like he was masturbating when it was taken...
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SonOfTheMask7 months, 4 weeks ago
And my sink makes 10. If it was meant as HUMOR then post it in the HUMOR channel...but even there it would not be funny.
Not your best submission RFE
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Dorothyalmon7 months, 4 weeks ago
THE EASIEST CURE FOR MASTURBATION
IS A HOT 20 YEAR OLD LOVER
WHO YOU BLEEP THE BLEEPING
DAYLIGHTS OUT OF 2R HOURS A DAY
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Dorothyalmon7 months, 4 weeks ago
MAYBE IF LIKE MORMONS
WE ALL HAD 5 OR 6 WIVES
TO SATISFIY WE WOULDN'T HAVE TIME
TO SPANK THE MONKEY.
CHOAK THE CHICKEN OR
DRAIN THE LIZARD.
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